|
||||
|
Back to AFRMA Info Page |
Pet Owner Grief By Marc A. Rosenberg, VMD Part 2 (Continued from Part-1) These are excerpts from the booklet published by ALPO Pet Center, ALPO Petfoods, Inc., P.O. Box 4000, Lehigh Valley, Pennsylvania, 18001-4000. 1986. Permission granted to reproduce sections.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR Outside private practice, Dr. Rosenberg is most widely known for his numerous radio and television appearances. His television series, People, Pets & Dr. Marc, is syndicated throughout the Public Broadcasting Service television network.
THE FINAL SEPARATION: QUESTIONS AND CONCERNS
Cemetery Burial The pet cemetery has several functions: It allows the pet owner to participate in a physical separation from the deceased animal; it provides a grieving person with the comfort of knowing the pets final resting place; and it provides a place of solitude for visitation. There can be great comfort derived from doing for a pet what would be done for a beloved human family member. More people would use pet cemeteries were it not for the stigma that is sometimes associated with themthat is, being considered eccentric by ones friends and associates. The financial cost of a pet burial can also be high, which no doubt is also a deterrent to wider use. Animal burial establishments offer options from a simple burial to a ritualistically complete funeral. The minimum burial cost is about $200, although some pet funerals can run into the thousands of dollars. Almost all pet cemeteries located in urban settings will work with the veterinary clinic, sending a representative to pick up the animals body. The pet owner, however, may choose to make all arrangements with the pet cemetery without using the veterinarian as a liaison.
Communal Burial When a client chooses a communal burial, an explanation by the veterinarian often helps answer questions about what exactly will happen to the pet. An honest, straightforward response that the animal will simply be put into the ground is called for. The owner can be assured that a pets dignity is in no way affected by communal burial. When the burial decision is left to the veterinary clinician, communal burial is one of the most common choices.
Communal Cremation
Individual Cremation
Home Burial Some home burials are coupled with a personalized service. This commonly occurs when there are young children in the family.
CONDOLENCE EFFORTS One way to soften the impact of a pets death is for the owner to make a donation to a worthy cause. Many veterinarians will ask that a donation in the memory of the deceased pet be sent to a humane organization or a scholarship fund. A client perceives this gesture as a way that his pet can continue to contribute, in a positive way, to the world it has left behind.
EUTHANASIA: A SPECIAL CASE Since it is impossible for the clinician to disassociate from the experience, euthanasia is difficult for him or her as well. In many cases, he or she has known the pet for many years and has fought long and hard to save its life. Adding to this burden is the fact that the pet owners demonstration of grief is often overt and disconcerting. When the clinician evaluates the situation in advance and takes time to understand the pet owners needs, a potentially uncomfortable procedure can be handled in a positive fashion.
The Procedure The decision to euthanize a pet is often more readily accepted if the pet owner can deal with the procedure in a manner that best fits his personality and emotional needs. When a pet owner comes to the clinic, the clinician should take a few minutes to discuss the procedure and the role the owner wishes to play.
When The Pet Owner Chooses To Stay By the same token, some clinicians are uncomfortable when the owner chooses to stay because of the possibility of the clients displaying a strong emotional response. A client may faint, for instance, forcing the clinician to tend both to a dying patient and an incapacitated pet owner. Moreover, an uncooperative pet may make venipuncture difficult. When any or all of these factors arise, euthanasia is perceived as a struggle rather than a peaceful separation. If a pet owner asks to be present during the procedure, taking the pet from the room for a few moments to insert an indwelling intravenous catheter often helps, reducing the risk of an imperfect puncture at a critical time. When the intravenous drug administration begins, the client may wish to stroke the animals head and speak gently to it. At the procedures conclusion, a blanket or towel can be used to cover the deceased pet. This minimizes trauma owners may experience if involuntary urination or defecation occurs. Most clinicians concede if a client requests to spend a few moments with the deceased pet. On occasion, however, the bereaved owner may stay for an unacceptable period, upsetting the veterinary hospital routine. After a reasonable time, the veterinarian can reenter the room, gently begin to walk the client out, and suggest that he will call the next day. This allows the clinician to create a graceful, supportive avenue for separating the owner from the deceased pet, yet provides time for heightened emotions to subside.
When The Pet Owner Chooses Not To Stay In some cases, a veterinarian may care for a pet from its first vaccinations to the time of euthanasia. The way in which the final procedure is handled can leave a greater impression on the pet owner than all the years of diligent care the animal has received. This factor alone points to the importance of investing the necessary time and effort to meet the needs of both the patient and the distressed client.
REFERENCES
ED. NOTE: Other sources are The Pet Loss Support Hotline
at the University of California, Davis, School of Veterinary Medicine
(916) 752-4200, Monday through Friday, 6:30 P.M.9:30
P.M. Pacific Time; summer hours are Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, 6:30
P.M.9:30 P.M. Pacific Time. They also put out a
little pamphlet that also has a list of suggested reading material.
You can write to: The Center for Animals in Society, School of Veterinary
Medicine, University of California, Davis, CA 95616. The book,
Forever Friends: Resolving Grief After The Loss Of A Beloved Animal,
by Joan Coleman, has topics on stages of grief, children and pet loss,
older adults and pet loss, sudden loss, pregrieving and euthanasia,
grief/loss and trauma exercises, memorializing your pet, and safe
place exercises. The soft cover book or four cassette audio album
is available from J.C. Tara Enterprises, Inc., 3230 E. Flamingo Road,
Ste. 276, Las Vegas, NV 89121 or phone 1-800-438-8813.
|
|||
| Part-1
|
(Back to Part-1) | |||
|
Back to AFRMA Info Page |
© 1995–2009 American Fancy Rat and Mouse Association. All text, artwork, and photos are copyright to AFRMA, and/or the author, artist, or photographer. Unauthorized copying of any part constitutes a breach of copyright law. |